Friday, April 24, 2009

The Sculptures of Marilyn Lucey


Marilyn Lucey is a nontraditional sculpture major at Maine College of Art. Here are some pieces from her upcoming thesis show. Amazing!


Marilyn used to make toys for a living.


A vision of moral turpitude, cast in bronze.


He is a fallen being, set on the floor so you have to look down on him.


Cloven hoofs!

Spring Sprang Sprung


Sunday, April 05, 2009

Ebune, the Procession of the Ram, 2009

Ebune, the annual Procession of the Ram (and celebration of spring) parade took place once again Sunday on April 5, 2009. After a solid week of cloudy skies, fog and rain, the skies cleared for this portentous harbinger of spring. The 6th annual parade was led again by Oscar Mokeme, director of Portland's Museum of African Culture.











Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Endless Things


Last fall, September or maybe October or early November, I started reading a book called The Solitudes I had picked up on the library sale shelf for two or three dollars. I was quickly hooked by the meandering mystic tale of protagonist Pierce Moffett, a historian who plumbs various depths of history, astrology and love in his travels outward from the Faraway Hills to Europe and in his travels inward through the depths of his own mind, heart and soul.

The novel, written by John Crowley, is potent fiction, interwoven with a rich variety of histories, fictions and occasional appearances by Shakespeare, Giordano Bruno and John Dee, among others. There are also witches and werewolves, spirits who live in a crystal globe and a Christian religious cult. I soon ordered Love and Sleep and then Daemonomania and finally Endless Things from my local bookstore.

Last night I finished Endless Things, the final book in the visionary quartet known as the Aegpyt Cycle. It was a long journey of reading and pondering that brought me through another Maine winter and distracted me through a relocation in December. Long as this journey is for the reader, the novels were twenty years in the writing and thirty years in the planning and pondering for the writer.

At the end of the last page of Endless Things I felt adrift. Wasn't there yet another book waiting for me at Longfellow Books, a continuation of Pierce Moffett's quixotic life? Yet in the end I felt satisfied to finish where it ended, quenched. Of course, such books are truly endless things.

Here are some of my favorite excerpts from the 1,787 pages I just read:

From The Solitudes:

"Rosie had begun to feel a little odd. It's all true. As though the actors in a play were to drop their roles, and then turn out to be in fact the characters they played, and turn to face their audience for real."

"Angels, linked in sequence like the weave of a garment, hand to hand, mouth to ear, eye to eye to eye, ascending and descending forever on the world's business with a sort of taffeta rustle that can be heard, if you stand silent enough, in the most silent places of the earth, or in the depths of a coiled shell."

"Translate your intentions into a speaking bird, and let the bird speak of your intentions; encode your message in a book on automata, and the automaton when built will trace the message with a clockwork hand. Write (as Abbot Trithemius had done) a book on how to call down angels, and if you do so correctly, you will instruct the angels how to write the Abbot's book themselves, in a tongue of their own, which when used will translate into works, miracles, sciences, peace on earth."

"Mind, at the center of all, contains within it all that it is the center of, a circle whose circumference is nowhere, stretching out infinitely in every direction he could look in or think about, at every instant."

"That year she walked continually in her life carrying another life, the one inside books, the one that engaged her the more intimately; her living was divided in two, reading and not reading, as completely and necessarily as it was divided into sleeping and being awake."

"For one kingdom is all kingdoms: a hill, a road, a dark wood; a castle to come to; a perilous bridge to cross."

"He thought: Is the universe one thing? And is the whole of it contained in every part?"

"Only this extraordinary colored toy theater of unhistory."

"He thought: there is not only more than one history of the world, one for each of us who studies it; there is more than one for each of us, there are as many as we want or need, as many as our heads and wanting hearts can make."

"The mind makes itself visible in the act of thinking, just as God makes himself visible in the act of creating."

"It was as though when he read Copernicus's placements of the planets, he felt the same planets in the heavens he kept within him (and their tutelary gods and spirits) open their eyes, and move to their proper places. And then the earth moving, too, and all its contents."

" 'A hero sets out,' Barr said, not turning back to his students but facing the sparkling quad and the air. 'To find a treasure, or to free his beloved, or to capture a castle or find a garden. Every incident, every adventure that befalls him as he searches, is the treasure or the beloved, the castle or the garden, repeated in different forms, like a set of nesting boxes--each of them however just as large, or no smaller, than all the others. The interpolated stories he is made to listen to only tell him his own story in another form.' "

". . . for it if was infinite outside, then it must be infinite inside as well."

"You made yourself equal to the stars by knowing your mother Earth was a star as well; you rose up through the spheres not by leaving the earth but by sailing it: by knowing that it sailed."

From Love & Sleep:

"One way magic really could be said to work, bad magic, was in convincing others that physical laws were bendable, even breakable, and that you knew how to do it, when you didn't at all."

"O pitiless chaste eyes regarding him, she whom no god as touched. Actaeon senses the soul within him, satisfied and ravenous at once, leap from his own eyes to dissolve in hers, even as her gaze pierces him. He has already lost his own form, unwanted anyway, and grown another. He feels the heavy horns like a crown spring from his fortunate brow. And the hounds that once coursed for him turn on him, knowing their duty, and set upon him to rend him. For Actaeon has become what he pursued."

"She offered him her hand in its figured glove (black kid, worked with small flowers: strawberry, pansy, violet, almost too small to see, only when her hand was kissed did the eye come close enough to perceive the gilded fly, pismire, polished beetle in amid the thicket, where the jewels of her rings were cast away)."

"Her forepart was worked with a forest, fountains, stubs of dead trees, moss of deep velvet pile; a forest fire too, astonishing, animals fleeing it, ermine, squirrel, fox and hart. Water earth air and fire."

"Love in God is endless fecundity, the continual, generous, unstinting production of things; love in Man is the endless hunger for the products of Infinity, never satisfied."

"Magic is love: nothing but the power of love in the heart of the operator can move the souls of others; nothing but love can command the intelligences of the air. Without love even the simplest Art of Memory could not operate; without attraction and revulsion, what attaches the soul to images?"

"But every Mass [he came with elation to see, it was years ago now, the stern Asturian mountains] was the whole History of the World as well, not simply pictured or rehearsed but having in its center precisely the same miracle, repeated daily throughout the churches of Christendom: Creation Fall Incarnation Passion Resurrection. Acts. End of the World."

"Every rising moment contains every older moment within it, contains them all even as it is itself contained in the next to arise."

From Daemonomania:

". . . the autumn darkness within him. . . "

"The dandelion is the sun's child. Pierce pointed out one that had come out by mistake in her brief shabby lawn, dazed by the weirdly warm October. Look at its golden head, a sunburst--which is a lion's mane too, and the lion, golden and noble, is the sun-beast above all. And the green leaves, dentate, fierce, dent-de-lion. Now cut its stem and see the sun's sign, which places it for sure among the sun's things, with the lion, and gold, and the goat and the honeycomb and the heliotrope and a thousand other things great and small. Read a book of such signatures and commit them to memory and you can use them for making medicines, say, or telling small futures; imagine the signatures in your heart, discover new ones, and open a way upward for yourself toward the heavens and the gods."

"Up in his vast castle on the hill above the silted river the black-clothed Emperor Rudolf had immured himself, King Saturn on his throne; around him in his galleries and closets and Kunstkammern was the rest of the world in small, earth air fire and water: precious stones heating the fires of distant planets in their tiny bodies; waterworks and clepsydras, pneumatic statues, hubble-bubbles that sang; the skins of birds and animals and fish, all in their orders and ranks; monsters too, snails found with jewels embedded in their shells or the names of saints or demons written on them, the skin of the little bear that a Jewish woman of Prague once gave birth to, which 'ran around the room and scratched itself behind the ear and died,' says the chronicler."

"Rudolf loved tiny things, worlds sculpted on cherrystones, clockwork insects, the life inside diamonds."

"What was odd was that as their neural fibers fire and grow warm and the parts that are most crowded with them enlarge even further, their eyes adjust the rest in proportion, though never quite catching up; so they both grow gigantic, as measured by the details of their largest parts, the flocked and dark and blood-rich parts: the purple-brown lips filmed with shining liquid, the tender eye-corner where the great globular tear forms, the drop of clear syrup in the blind cyclops eye of."

"Love is magic, Giordano Bruno said; magic is love. The magician and the lover are both venatores animarum, hunters of souls; by emblems and by arts, the magician draws down into his heart the powers of heaven, that is the star-persons through whom the whole of nature and the spirits of men and women are ordered, and have their meaning. He ranges these powers within him and asks: teach me to bind, with bonds, like love's the things of this world and the hearts of others. And they do, they can. And thus we become like gods."

"Using tricks he had neglected so long he had to knock on his brow to recall how to do them--tricks the common people thought devilish, but which were natural, natural--John Dee passed out of the tower room at evening, arm in arm with his wolf, and down and out. . . "

"For a moment they jostled; then without a word Dee whirled twice around widdershins, and Bruno cried out, for he faced not an elderly Englishman but a tall pillar of adamant.
But in a moment Brono, fired by fear and need, had changed himself to a jug of red wine, and poured himself out and around the pillar's base.
But the pillar became a flopping marble dolphin that drank the wine."

From Endless Things:

"Right now, this moment, he'd said, and he sat up and stretched out his arms and closed his eyes: just now, as I open my eyes. all time and history, all my own history, too, right up to the very memory I have just now closing my eyes--it all never existed before, and would all, right now, come into being.
Now. And he opened his eyes on her."

"What he hadn't known, and would never learn later, was that by then the thing lost had already been found. It had been found by him and others, and redeemed from the place where it was hidden and at threat, and restored to the place it should possess; and this even, small and unimportant though it seemed, had stopped the decline of the whole world toward dissolution, toward frozen inanition and repetition such as Pierce had experienced in the cold halls and hot rooms of Rose. The world--"the world," all this, day and night, self and others, things and other things, inside and out--had been coasting to a stop, and just in time had been put back in a forward gear again. And then it could continue, and would, until all traces of that moment of redemption were erased from all hears and memories. . . New-wakened Adam would then open his eyes again, the beautiful circle would close, and roll on forever into the future and the past at once."

" 'So then I'd consider how such other worlds are made or were made,' he said. 'How does one world turn into another, become the next. How are they, you know, cast.'
"Cosmoporia,' said Barr. 'World-making.'
"Um yes.'
"That poria being the root of our word poetry, of course. Poets being makers. Makers of poems, and of the worlds in them.' "

"Beau Brachman once told him. . . that there is no history. The world, he said, is like a hologram: break apart the photographic plate on which a hologram has been printed, and you can show that every part of it contains the whole image, if you look at it with laser light. Every part of every part, down to the smallest resolvable crumb. In the same way (Beau said) our original situation is present in every divisible moment of all succeeding situations, but (he said and smiled that smile) you need a special light to see it."

"Fellowes Kraft liked empires that were so old, and grown so complex, that they could be named, and belonged to, and traveled in, but not controlled: that had frontiers, but inside were limitless."

"Nothing, in fact, is finite except as it is perceived by the limiting categories of the mind."

"For what was being told was not so much a story as a situation, a circumstance endlessly elaborating itself without ever unfolding any further, like an infinite carpet in which the central figure is surrounded by the same figure in a larger size, and that by the same figure in a still larger size, over and over.
And all those figures, Dr. Pons taught him, earthly and heavenly and above the heavens, are wrapped around a single infinitesimal spark of light at the center of being, like the layers and layers of pearl with which an oyster coats the grain of sand that irritates him so. That grain of light, irreducible, eternal, infinite even in being infinitesimal, is simply the cetermost point of your heart."

". . . that it is not unreasonable after all to believe that one's own subjectivity is bound up in the nature of things; that really we have no independent evidence of how the world is; that if our consciousness contributes to making the world, then our consciousness can alter it."

"No one could read the words, though, for a great dead calm prevailed, as still and clear as glass, here and elsewhere; in the light of dawn the opposing army seemed suddenly shockingly close to them, as though they saw themselves in an unexpected mirror at the turning of a corridor."

". . . the infinitesimals that composed them, in their transmigration across the infinite universe, will form other beings just as strange and plain and wonderful."

". . . we call them gods because they are within us, because they made our bodies and our minds for us too, because we recognize their faces from long ago, because we love and need and fear them, every one."

"With Bruno's refusal. . . all the gods, angels, monsters, powers, and principalities of that age began their retreat into the subsidiary realms where they reside today, harmless and unmoving, most of them anyway, for most of us most of the time."

"When the Labyrinth of the World comes disguised as the Paradise of the Heart, that's when it becomes terrible."

". . . Pierce's own Golden City as it was everyone's; the best city, toward which we all strive and which we never reach, because it is the city only of the past and of the future, where the labyrinth of the world is exactly coextensive with the paradise of the heart, and how then could it ever be traveled to?"

"He had always known the secret of those stories in which heroes set out in search of precious hidden things; everybody knows it. The journey is itself what brings the jewel or the stone or the treasure or the prize into being; the act of seeking is the condition by which the thing sought comes to be. In fact the search isn't different from the thing sought."

"It was as though the sources of certain events lay not in their antecedent causes but in mirror or shadow events that lay far in the past or in the future; as though by chance a secret lever on a clockwork could be pressed that made it go after being long still, or as though a wind blowing up in one age could tear leaves from trees and bring down steeples in another."

"So the way to defeat power is to propose new laws, laws conceived in the secrecy of the heart and enacted by the will's fiat: laws of desire and hope, which are not fixed but endlessly mutable, and unimposable on anyone else. They are the lawas of another history of the world, one's own."

"For readers, time in a novel goes only one way: the past told of int he turned pages is fixed, and the future inexistent till read. But actually the writer, like God, stands outside of time, and can begin his creation at any moment in it. All the past and all the future are present in his conception at once, nothing fixed until all of it's fixed. Then he keeps this secret from the reader, as God might keep his secret from us: that the world is as though written, and erasable, and rewritable. Not once but more than once: time and again."

"Jesus seemed to grow less sure of himself the nearer the agony came. Just a frightened human after all. What have I done."

". . . and the wood did seem to be gazing on her or looking away from her with that unsettling indifference that accumulates in wild places as marks of human habitation get left behind. . . "

". . . she had in fact gone through to where the same things occurred in a different place and that was the place she now was."

"The two profoundest words there are: remember and her brother forget."

"Life is dreams, checked by physics."

"Mercy. Because there is an end to justice and to fairness, when everything is paid out, and all accounts are settled: but there's no end to mercy."

"The eye is the mouth of the heart."

"Just another day," Pierce said, loading his car, the Festina wagon. "Another day of living and striving in the fields of the actual and the possible."

"And for the first time he had seen where he stood, and that he might go on by turning around, by turning back: might find, on his own, an exit from the labyrinth of the heart, his heart, and a way out into the paradise of the world: the fragile, sorrowing, inadequate, endless paradise of the world, the only one he or anyone could ever know."

"You knew what harmonies were possible because of how you strung the instrument, but not what harmonies you'd get."

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Two Great Films

I recently had the pleasure of watching two great films.


Wendy and Lucy
, by Kelly Reichhardt, is the story of a young girl on her way to seek her fortunes working at a cannery in Alaska. Her car breaks down and a variety of troubles ensue. It is a delicate, emotional film, a snapshot of frailty and strength, sorrow and determination.

I saw it at Frontier Cafe, a stunning movie theater and restaurant located in an rehabbed old mill. Frontier is a huge open space with panoramic views of a dam, waterfalls and a bridge. The food is healthy and delicious. It has vast ceilings, large tables and a little comfy living room area with sofas. The movie theater has long tables in front of the seats so you can eat while you watch eclectic movies. When I was there I had Vietnamese Pho soup with soba noodles, onions, snow peas, and other vegetables. The movie theater has long tables in front of the seats so you can eat while you watch movies.



The second great movie I saw was the documentary, The Genius of Lenny Breau, a movie produced by Emily Hughes, the daughter who barely knew him.

Lenny Breau (1941-1984) was a prodigal genius, a jazz guitar player who at the age of 14 was fronting his parents' band. His mom and dad toured Canada as Lone Pine and Betty Cody, playing country western tunes. Lenny eventually shifted into a unique jazz sound that combined flamenco, classical, and country. He was good friends with Chet Atkins, whose fingerpicking style influenced him tremendously. Lenny was also a drug addict, with a tenacious habit that often sent him home to his mom's place in Auburn, Maine, to dry out. He died in mysterious circumstances in 1984, though clean at the time.

The movie has some amateurish touches, with occasional lapses into schmaltz, but it's a great overview of Lenny and his work, with wonderful archival footage and interviews with an eccentric cast of characters, including Chet Atkins, Randy Bachman, Pat Metheny, Andy Summers, music critic, teacher and performer Ted Greene, George Benson and more.

There are excerpts from the movie and other videos of Lenny performing available on You Tube, such as this one, which demonstrates Lenny's incredible versatility and style.

"The sound of silence is intense." -- Lenny Breau


Friday, March 20, 2009

Spring Equinox Sights

Ryder


Faces in Belfast




How to Tie Knots in Belfast


The Belfast Co-op (Best Co-Op in Maine!)


An Oil Tank Disguised As Giant Watermelon in Camden


Christmas Boat in Camden


The Mystery Book Shop


Collapsed Bicycle


Beauty Wreath


Edna St. Vincent Millay's Home Town


Mount Battie


Giant Anchor


Face in the Window


Walnut Cream Pie at Moody's Diner: WOW

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Bach Cello Concertos by Yo-Yo Ma


On February 26 I had the great fortune to attend a solo cello performance by the master Yo-Yo-Ma at Merrill Auditorium, presented by the Portland Concert Association's Great Performances series. The program was Suite No. 1 in G Major, Suite No. 5 in C Minor and Suite No. 3 in C Major, three cello concertos by J.S. Bach. Yo-Yo Ma slipped in a couple of surprises, including Mark O'Connor's "Appalachian Waltz" and "Partita for Solo Cello" by the late Turkish composer Ahmed Adnan Saygun. Some audience members expressed their disappointment that he had changed the program in reviews and blogs after the concert. I didn't at all mind his innovative, eclectic selections and admire a master who can spontaneously add some surprises to a rigid program.

The cello is my favorite instrument and to hear this musical prodigy perform solo pieces was an absolute dream come true. It was a transportive, otherworldly spiritual experience for me and I was enraptured by every single note which opened up entire worlds through the intricate and difficult passages of Bach's complex landscapes.

I had purchased tickets last fall when I first heard about the concert, and they were expensive for my budget, but the experience was priceless. An added bonus was experiencing Ma's friendly, down-to-earth rappor with the audience.

For the encore he played a mysterious and haunting piece by Ennio Morricone, from the soundtrack to The Mission. I didn't recognize this piece and was surprised and amused to hear what it was.

All in all, this concert was a once in a lifetime experience for me. I can only hope I get to hear him play live again someday.

I would love to hear the upcoming Toumani Diabaté and the Symmetric Orchestra in May.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day

the "heart bandits" strike again!




Treasure Hunting at the Local Library



Like I need more books. I should be donating them books, not buying them. Still, I couldn't resist and even left work early to go to the latest Portland Public Library book sale, held a few times a year in the auditorium. I tend not to go right at the opening because in past years the line used to go out the door and the frenzy when everyone stormed into the library was overwhelming. The book dealers would be flipping through the books, tossing the good ones in boxes, like they were trying to pick fruit with a tornado bearing down on them.

The powers that be have made the sale earlier in the day and by the time I got there there was still a sense of delirium in the air, but the first rush was already in the checkout line.

I used to come home from these sales with a mountain of books, including hardcover treasures I planned to cut up for collages. Although I did make some collages out of them, I've tried to cut back on this compulsion, especially after the time I moved apartments and found myself dragging along these big heavy cardboard boxes of old magazines and collage books. I've also gotten pretty selective about what I buy. The library does a good job at labeling the sections, i.e. Fiction, Biography, Poetry/Literature, Social Issues, Art, etc. Sometimes books get mixed up, though so you might find an unusual poetry book you want in, say, the health section. It all makes for great treasure hunting.

For $13.50 I garnered the treasures pictured here, along with two CDs: Rain Forests, Oceans, and Other Themes by John Fahey (recorded in Portland, Oregon, our sister city) and Mirrorball, a live CD by Sarah McLachlan. John Fahey is a legendary master of the wooden guitar and Sarah's songs send me into an emotional vortex in a good way.

Kitsch (The World of Bad Taste) by Gillo Dorfles, with contributions and essays by a variety of art critics and provocateurs, is pretty amazing, as you can tell by the cover (top image). Out of print, published in 1968, I found a reference to a collectible version of the book on Amazon that says the First Edition, published by Bell Publishing Company, is worth around $100. Amazing. Unfortunately, mine is a second edition, which is worth about $10 in the used book market. Other hardcover reprints are available for as little as $3 on the Internet. It was the first book I picked it up, floating around on the art table. It didn't look that excited (except for that irresistable gaudy cover), until you looked inside and saw the variety of commentary and reproductions in the book, which is really a critical compedieum of history, art criticism and social commentary. Amazing illustrations include a series of postcards, each representing an episode of Napoleon's life, which when put together form a complete figure of Napoleon; a souvenir from Venice featuring a plastic version of Jesus' crucifixion on colored seashells; a still from the film about van Gogh Lust for Life; a photo of lacquered tree trunk photographs; a photo of a swastika coffee cup; and so much more. Another reader blogged about it here in more detail.


sleep (bedtime reading) by Robert Peacock (folk art collector, author and curator) and Roger Gorman (designer) is a handsomely printed and designed hardcover book that features an odd assortment of work by such photographers as William Wegman, Nan Goldin, Sandy Skoglund and Duane Michals and an even odder assortment of writing by Laurie Anderson, Fran Lebowitz, Richard Hell, Lou Reed, Paul Auster and John Updike among others. It has a very urban, New York feel to it.

Nude in Tub, Stories of Quillifarkeag, Maine by G.K. Wuori is a great book by an Illinois writer I suspect for obvious reasons has spent some time in Maine. I had read these stories before in a hardcover version (from the library) and was very impressed. I had considered buying the hardcover version new, but don't spend a lot of money on new books. Years later, here it was. I couldn't resist. These quirky stories are divided into sections called "Land," "Love," "Law," "Learning," "Loss" and "Life." They are funny but savage. One story, called simply "Family" opens:

"It was an educated crew -- that family -- that went wild outside of Quilli, the man starting out as a professor at the tiny state university in town, his wife and four kids wanting to live out somewhere, way out, an old way in a new time.
'This is Maine,' they said, and listed it all: heavy coats, woodstoves, lakes and rivers frozen by Christmas, moose, wolves, even eagles. The wife said, 'I'm going to relearn French.' The children went Pow! Pow! Pow!"






This little book, Come Climb My Hill by Winston O. Abbott, with illustrations by Leon Tebbetts, is a gem. It's a small out of print hardcover, published in 1947 by Falmouth Publishing House, a small book press run by Tebbetts, who used to run a legendery tiny used bookstore in Hallowell, Maine. That bookstore was crammed to the rafters and had many small cul de sacs. Leon was there well into his 80s and I remember meeting him. This book is hardcover, with the original jacket and charming color drawings, printed on creamy yellow pages that were handcut. It's worth about $20 on the antiquarian market.

"To me there is something deeply inspiring about a tree, a tree with its branches flung heavenward twoard the fathomless blue of the sky and its groping roots anchored security in the good earth beneath. I suppose that a tree could not be said to have a personality, and yet trees are possessed of as great a variety of characteristics as people. And though I am an admirer of hemlock and maple, elm and pine, I look with especial favor upon the oak. For the oak is to me a symbol of rugged strength and enduring courage and tenacity of purpose."

The Soul's Book of Answers by Carol Bolt (author of The Book of Answers, Love's Book of Answers, and The Literary Book of Answers) is a very silly book, though a clever idea. Using "bibliomancy," the idea is to ask a question, riffle the pages of the book and find an answer. At least it won't break, like those silly "eight ball" oracles of the 70s. I got a first edition, which makes it worth $16 (it's original price) in theory (by a bookseller on Amazon), though I can't imagine why anyone would pay that much. I got it for an "office present" for one of my co-workers birthdays. The soft fuzzy blue covering is a bonus.

Here, let's test it. I asked it, "Will I find success as a writer?" The answer? "This dewlike life [will] fade away; avoid involvement in superfluous things." Hmmm. That's interesting. Why the brackets? is a more burning question.



Advanced Cinematherapy (The Girl's Guide to Finding Happiness One Movie At a Time) by Nancy Peke and Beverly West (authors of Cinematherapy: The Girl's Guide to Movies For Every Mood, Meditations for Med Who Do Nothing (and Would Like to Do Even Less) and How to Satisfy a Woman Every Time on Five Dollars a Day) is another fun bit of silliness that originally retailed for $13.95. Another office gift. It's actually pretty good, with chapters like "I'm Not Waving, I'm Drowning: Rescue Fantasy Movies" and " 'Oh Her? She's My Sister': Trust Issues Movies." It's fun to read the descriptions, the sprinkling of quotations, actor profiles (Gabriel Byrne's "Top Drool Pics" are listed in The Handy Hunk Chart). There's fluff like "Women We Wish We Could Go for a Beer With" (Christina Ricci, Jean Harlow, Parker Posey. . . ) and "Freudian Slipups" (On Casablanca: "Until we women rewrite our internal scripts for romance, we guess Hollywood will just keep stoking the fire of our dysfunction.") Quasi-feminist, but mostly a great gimmick (hmmmm, there seems to be money in these gimmicky books), it has some recipes too!

Last but not least, I got a copy of the book Art & Fear, Observations On the Perils (and Rewards) of Artmaking by David Bayles & Ted Orland, two working artists. This was recommended to me once upon a time by an art teacher, I got it from a library, and I have long wanted a copy of my own. It's a short practical treatise that undercuts the damning voices of self-sabotage, such as "I'm not an artist -- I'm a phony" and "Other people are better than I am." It's a book for visual artists, per se, but the basic advice can be applied to pretty much any creative endeavor.

"Artmaking involves skills that can be learned. The conventional wisdom here is that while 'craft' can be taught, 'art' remains a magical gift bestowed only by the gods. Not so. In large measure becoming an artist consists of learning to accept yourself, which makes your work personal, and in following your own voice, which makes your work distinctive. . . "